* In this blog, most of the thoughts that I will share come from a very personal perspective and they may not apply to everyone.
Most Difficult Part
The most challenging part about producing this film was creating a single film while being apart from each other. Having to shoot from 5 different locations with 5 different shooting styles made it difficult for our editor to string all the pieces together into one cohesive film. Each group member had to create appropriate sequences that represented the film's message when watched as a whole. While you can argue that group meetings and discussions can still happen virtually, having no human contact inevitably builds walls within communication. That was something we had to work through to the very end.
Another difficult part about approaching this project was having to confront the huge genre that is experimental film. Stepping into a field of film that is relatively new to all of us, it was difficult for me to be transparent through the process. The feeling of paranoia that you are not striking the right chord because you are not familiar with the song can be very daunting - that's how it felt entering the genre of experimental. While filming certain shots or putting together specific sequences, I felt that my guard was always up because I did not want to end up creating something too try-hard.
The biggest trick, I guess, in this whole process, was being mindful about keeping things simple while continuing to have all of them meaningful layers that went into making the film.
A New Appreciation/ Understanding
Through making this experimental film with my teammates, I now have a more profound appreciation for the ambiguity of experimental films. In the past when discussing the tropes of this genre, I find that I had this misconception that anything goes - I've since realised, however, that it's more than that. Having free-rein does not necessarily make something easier or more slip-shod - in fact, it requires you to be stronger, conceptually, not just as a filmmaker but as an individual.
Something else that I understand, which I think applies to all genres of film, is that your end-product is much bigger than you. This concept to me causes a lot of doubt and skepticism with this whole craft of filmmaking. However, I believe that this feeling of imbalance is, in a way, the very balance you need as a filmmaker - the weighing scale that measures the creator and her product.
Using the New Insight in your Own Style of Filmmaking
Touching on the point of imbalance, I think that a great takeaway to consider in future film projects is to allow the process of filmmaking to constantly question you - who you are, how legitimate you are, how you portray yourself, who you want to be, how you've changed.
I believe that you have not truly experienced something if it hasn't challenged you in some way. Making choices in film, whether it be something logistical like deciding on a budget cut or something creative like choosing a crazy camera movement, tell you a lot about yourself and what you want and it's very important to pay attention to these things. They might not seem clear at the moment, but they become more enlightening along the way.
Also, I think it's great to give your films the acknowledgement they deserve after the filmmaking process has been completed. Stepping back and respecting your art for what it is - something that is much bigger than you. While you're creating something, it feels like a reflection of you but when you've created something and put it out there, it almost becomes its own and though you can keep it close, some part of you has to let it go. However, if your process was pure and truthful to the craft, it won't stray that far from you.
Creative/ Artistic Choices
One of the references we looked to for our experimental film was Catharsis (Robert Machado, 2018).
This film visits the mind-scape of a young female protagonist. We are taken through a range of her thoughts and emotions - portrayed by her movements and coloured projections cast upon her. Each colour accompanies a different emotion and accentuates the mental struggle she is going through. As our experimental film, 'Fragments,' was about following the mental journey of our main character, we referenced certain tropes used in Catharsis. The use of colour to depict an emotion was used, mainly in post-production. The focus on the main character with the use of headshots was also used, to remind the viewer every now and again that we are in his mind. We had split the filming of 'Fragments' into 5 different stages and mine was 'Acceptance'. As such, I referenced some other clips to help me with this. This was the turn-out of my segment before it was included in the collective edit.
Clips that I referenced were some experimental shorts a friend and I did in the earlier part of 2019, when we were on a trip to rural Borneo. We had no internet connection for 2 weeks but we did have a Fuji XT3 and some really itchy hands to film something each day. I also had my laptop and could edit some clips offline. Here is the collection (the first was filmed before the trip during a camera test):
As reflected in these clips, the treatment of this small experimental project was to work with nature shots and express them as something mechanical - playing on the irony of how the natural sometimes feels very synthetic in the modern day. Nature is something that is sold to the public as an enlightening and enriching experience when in actuality, we would think that we'd already have an instinctive appreciation for it, without the need for it to be glorified for our consumption.
I was inspired by these small tests to also work with nature shots in my segment of 'Fragments'. Being able to shoot something quite pure and treat it into something completely different was great fun and very useful in telling our story of overthinking.
Something else that inspired my artistic treatment of my segment was a clip a made from my recent trip to Moscow, Russia, last Christmas. Despite the shots being very different from what I shot for 'Fragments', the movement of the shots (edited in post) were lightly referenced from this clip.
Although heavy rotations and colour divisions were not used in my 'Acceptance' segment, I did add slight zooms and dolly ins to some of the shots to give them a perplexing look. These movements were, however, kept very slow to maintain the calm of 'Acceptance'.
As for sound design choices, I took some inspiration from an animated experimental by David Firth. Firth did a series called 'Salad Fingers' back in 2007. It went on for a total of 11 disturbing but really beautiful episodes. Each episode had very thoughtful sound design but I will just link the 1st episode as an example.
In this series, depicted in the first episode, the background music used is similar to what I used in the 'Acceptance' segment. The music is underlying and seemingly mellow and it carries the visuals that are placed above it. What it also does is it makes the viewers question the genuineness of the visuals because how can something look and sound so calming - is it too good to be true?
To create a balance in the viewers skepticism, I added the layers of vocals saying 'relax' and they were further treated to be stretched out and their pitch lowered. This was to try and disarm the already paranoid viewers and send them into a less heightened state before sending them back onto the vicious cycle that is overthinking.
Improvements
Better communication regarding the style and message of the film as well as transitions we could use to string 5 differently shot segments into one cohesive piece could have helped to improve the final output of the film. Each segment was meant to target a different stage but each stage was supposed to lead to the next and therefore the bridge was lacking and that showed in the end product.
Although it was a given that each segment would be filmed individually, I think that having them individually edited before they were made into a collective might have contributed to a more "fragmented" result as well.
The sequence on 'Fear' stood out too much as it was very narratively shot and edited. Our collective editor therefore had to re-treat that footage into a more experimental sequence that could fit well into the final product.
As it was also pointed out in the feedback session, the message of our film, the way in which it was explained to the viewers and the title were not matched up too well. Perhaps we could have altered the title of the film or even changed the way in which it was explained to our viewers. I understand how it can be confusing but I do want to comment on how the production, evaluation and even reflection of this whole experimental film leads back to our topic of focus - overthinking.
Whenever we put something out, we think about how it can be done better. The thing about that question is that you can ask it an infinite number of times and get an infinite number of answers and that is because - everything can always be better than what it is and nothing will ever feel quite final and that leads back to what a film becomes when you put it out - something that is much bigger than you and always leaves you standing with questions unanswered, even though you may be its sole creator.
Here is our final film:
- Vin
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